a life less ordinary

"I love you like certain DArk Things are loved..secretly, between the shadow and the soul.." - Pablo Neruda

Monday, July 03, 2006

GONE......

There was a story I heard…two or three days ago…about a girl who lost everything she held dear. What was dear to her meant something that had 2 arms and 2 legs. What was dear to her was the soothing company of a particular guy…the soft caress whom she grew very fondly of. They once met in a small coffee shop within the city. It was something they never expected to happen in a day such as that clumsy day was. They talked for hours and laughed for hours. They forgot their names and who they were. Everything seemed so unimportant. She remembered swearing oaths to him while in bed. She remembers looking into his eyes and building a world in each of them. She saw a life with him and never saw anything else. And now she finds herself crying…swearing at life and all its intricacies. How rudely everything falls apart. She does not remember what she did wrong…or where it went wrong. She just knew something happened…and it all came falling apart. She could not care for the dry world she now lived in…all she ever knew and wanted was gone…he was gone. Life seemed chaotic…dull…and unimportant. She buried herself under blankets and sheets. It seemed like the only thing she could do. But it was not the only thing that he could do. He came again…just like before…from a flash of light…he was there again…in her bed…under her blankets and sheets. He came again…and he held her tight. She did something she never thought possible anymore…she cried even harder. She cried loud and hard…and held him so tight...tighter than anything she ever held before. For a moment, he was just there…staring at her…giving that comforting smile she always liked. Life seemed fuller and she suddenly stops falling. She felt saved. She forgot who she was, where she was, and everything else that happened in this life. She just knew one thing. She knew she was happy with him. It’s a sudden acceptance that she cannot live without him. What seemed like forever in hell suddenly ended. She felt an uneasy comfort…drenched in false hopes. She hears him say those 3 words she so longed to hear.

Then suddenly like a passing splash of water…he was gone…and she felt the tearing fire of hell condemning her again. The empty hole in her chest burst wide open yet again. She cries even harder and louder under blankets and sheets…where no one can hear her. Where her life is but a fleeting paper gone with the wind…buried somewhere…which the world will never stop for, care for, and wonder about…Where she will see nothing…but what could and would have been…